Our Favorite Horse Jokes

What did the horse say when she fell?
--   “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy-up!”

Why are most horses in shape?
--   Because they are on a stable diet.

A man goes into a movie theater and sits down. In the dark, he thinks he sees a horse a few rows over. Surprised, the man says out loud, “What is a horse doing in a movie theater?”
--   The horse replies, “Well, I liked the book.”

Why do cowboys ride horses?
--   Because they're too heavy to carry.

What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse?
--   The ground.

A racehorse owner takes his aging horse to the vet. “Will I be able to race this horse again?” he asks.
--   The vet replies, “I don’t see why not. Besides, you’ll probably win.”

What does it mean if you find a horseshoe?
--   Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.

What kinds of horses can jump higher than a house?
--   All of them. Houses can't jump.

A man walks up to a Shetland pony that’s coughing and asks, “Do you have a sore throat?”
--   The pony replies, “No, I’m just a little horse.”